How To Identify and Deal with a Narcissist

Narcissist are strenuous sets of persons to deal with and most usually can be very frustrating as partners if the other partner lacks a high tolerance or endurance level as well as is very understanding and knowledgeable about their partners condition. Ideally, relationships are meant to be enjoyable and nothing more. Therefore, dealing with a narcissist for too long might not be what many signed up for. Narcissism is nevertheless a medical condition that affects the brain, this explains the extremity of their actions and why they are full of themselves.

Here are Common Signs to help you identify a Narcissist:

This is one most common sign of a narcissist, it is a high level of self esteem that could pass for pride rather than confidence. It rates itself better than others in every respect, superior and usually right and others wrong, flawed or incompetent. Interestingly narcissists can also get that superior feeling by being the most hurt, the most wrong, or the most ill or injured. They just sort of have extremities for everything, an entitlement to things and treatments.

Little Sense of Empathy: Narcissists barely understand the word Empathy let alone no how to express it. They do not understand how hurtful their actions or words could be towards others but expect empathy. Possibly feels the need for attention, they love to receive care or be told so but they seem never to believe it or get enough of it and they barely ever reciprocate same without hoping it for it in return. Oftentimes, a narcissist blames the one person who is most emotionally attached, and loyal in their lives. They just do not seem to understand other peoples emotions.

Heap Blames and Deflect: Narcissist have a strong tendency to pass blames as well as deflecting from the original subject of discussion just to find something to pick at to put the fault on other than themselves. A complete lack of responsibility to actions especially when they turn out wrong. Even, when they love to head things, they just do not want to own up to face a flaw when it turns out the opposite way. It has to be someone else’s fault and sometimes that blame gets generalized everyone takes a bite. But wants to take all the credit if it goes well.

Dissatisfaction and Wants to Stay in Control:
Narcissists always have a story-line in mind about what each “character” in their interaction should be saying and doing. When you don’t behave as expected, they become quite upset and unsettled. They don’t know what to expect next because you’re off-script. They demand that you say and do exactly what they have in mind so they can reach their desired conclusion. They are highly attuned to perceive anger, threats and rejection. They most usually misread subtle facial expressions and interprets them as negative.

Lack of Boundaries
Many people lack boundaries or cross other people’s boundaries regularly, but among narcissists, this is on another level. Narcissists just can’t accurately see where they end and you begin. They are everywhere in your space, entitled to your life, your things, especially when you are close to them, they go mad when they are turned down.

How to Deal With Them Effectively

  1. Always set clear boundaries when dealing with anyone especially a narcissist, this may not sit well with them but it will help you in future always bear in mind it’s not your job to control their emotions.
  2. When you need something or need to say something, speak in very clear and concise terms. Make sure your request or point is totally understood by them.
  3. Choose your words carefully and endeavor to make comments in careful, positive ways. Do not often lose your cool especially in cases you feel cornered or gas-lighted.
  4. Being with a narcissist can affect your feelings, you may feel lees of yourself, and confused or unsecured about who you are so surround yourself with persons who remind you of how amazing you are inspite the narcissist.

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